i haven’t been able to write much because I’ve been busy truing to get my life together. I’m hoping that i will be able to update you all on the girls and myself this weekend.
but don’t worry, we are doing well given the situation :)
I hope I can get used to this new life. It’s tough and right now I don’t see when it is supposed to get any easier.
thank you everyone for your kind words and uplifting thoughts. i wish i could be strong all of the time but i can’t because I’m only human. oh and my hormones are all over the place right now because of the pregnancy. to be truthful I’ve had a rough time the last couple of days. a lot of the why and what if thoughts have been in my head. also a lot of thinking about a completely different future than what i had planned for myself. i know i am a strong woman so i guess this situation will show me exactly how strong i am and how strong i can be.
one thing that i am happy about is that i have a good head on my shoulders and i am naturally very responsible. i have a plan for my future already in motion. I’m glad that i have my degree and will be able to go out and get a second job once this baby is born and have a little bit more financially security.
this whole situation just completely sucks and its going to take some time to get used to. so, I’m sure there will be plenty of whiney post to come. lol
6 months pregnant is feeling like 9 months pregnant. My belly is itchy and stretched and feels so heavy, I grew overnight and I have only a few things that fit me, my feet are swollen, I have cankles, I am constantly hungry, I get extremely tired and lightheaded if I’m standing for more than 5 minutes, my back is killing me, I’m always exhausted when I wake up in the morning because I can’t get comfortable and when I do I have to get up in 20mins to pee, simple task like giving the girls a bath or putting them in and out of the car I absolutely dread, and I’m starting to waddle.
I feel horrible, I’m stressed beyond belief, and I feel completely alone. But you would never guess that because I put a smile on my face and I put up a strong front. I have to be strong for myself and my girls. I know I’m a strong woman and I’ll make it through this, but I just wish I didn’t have to.
I wish I was more excited about this pregnancy and had a partner to share in that excitement. I wish I had a partner that would stand by me and tell me we would make it through together.
I guess I just wish I wasn’t in the situation that I’m in.
Packing, packing, and selling.
Randee is supposed to have the girls this weekend so I’m going to try to get as much done as possible. I still have a bunch of packing to do and today the baby resale store near my house is buying baby items. Since this baby is a boy :) I’m looking at selling a lot of the girls old things. It makes me a little sad but right now we need the money and we really won’t have the space for it when we get an apartment.
We gotta be out of this house by the end of the month so it’s gonna be a busy next few weeks. Especially since nowadays I feel more like 8 months pregnant instead of 5! Anyways, I better get started